Thomas as the Aristocrat

"I think twilight has made reading cool"

"I kind of have a policy about friending people i don't know"

"You are so special - in the LOST kind of way - anytime - come to us..."
- Susan Genoni

"maybe I'm petty, but it really bothers me when people us the term "constellation prize.""

"whoawhoa Inland Empire is on Netflix Instant watch. I'm going for broke yall"

"I was livin at the taco bell and workin at the pizza hut... then i lucked into this deal."

"Ohhhhhhhh, Chicken!"

"I'm coming out!!!! And it feels fabuuuuuuulllllloooooouuuuuussssss!"

French Toast:- fried bread dipped in egg batter

As the title would suggest, this Headian story is derived from a breakfast encounter, from the Head backlog.

We all know, Thomas likes food. Whether it is cooked, uncooked, marinated, or not. We also know that he does not have the most refined pallet. The french toast of object was cooked and waiting in the oven for all to enjoy. There also happened to be two pieces of unbattered, unfried bread sitting on the counter. Thomas picks up the raw bread, dusts it with powdered sugar and pours maple syrup on it. About half way through his gesticulation he says "I dont think this is French Toast". It wasn't.

Oh, after his flub he also tried to backtrack by cooking his half eaten french toast in the oven, "no, Thomas, you gotta fry it", and then he tried frying it in my bacon pan, "Thomas, I thought you were a vegetarian". Poor Tom Tom.

Keep your car turned off when you leave the state.

Today, I received a phone call from my roommate Jamie Macquerrie who tells me that there is a police officer at our house. Officer Sanford is asking if we know someone who owns a Nissan Sentra. The police have traced a black Nissan Sentra that has been left running with the driver door open, parked by the Baskin Robbins. Do I know to whom this car belongs?
Yes, it belongs to Head. Was the car stolen? Had something awful happened to Head?
No, he dropped his car off there to hop in his coworker's car to drive down to Oregon. A lady had seen a man get out of the car 45 minutes before she called the cops, and then Officer Sanford headed to our house, the address on Head's car registration. When I picked up his car, there were two cop cars parked nearby and several officers standing around the car. By now, Head was already in Oregon.
Is it Thomas' fault that he left the car running? No, he can't be held responsible for cars running and doors left open when he is thinking about the Principles by Which Dogs Live. How can you blame a man for his high-mindedness? There just isn't any room in his brain for anything but Great Questions of Life.