“Now I'm never going to get the smell of dairy product out of my new sheets.”

Three-thirty in the morning the phone rings. Drowsily grab it and blink at the flashing screen: Thomas. Ignore. Two seconds later, rings again.

“What?” (Exasperated).

“Can I come sleep on your couch? Todd and Ryan are being dicks. “

“Fine.”

Click.

Ten minutes later Head arrives, looking bedraggled and clearly traumatized.

“Todd and Ryan are drunk. I was reading in bed and they came into my room both naked, sprayed me with whipped cream and meatspun me.” (Meatspin: http://www.meatspin.com/)

The icing on the cake? A dollop of whipped cream still lodged in left Head’s ear.